Wednesday, April 15, 2009

"Significant achievements have never been obtained by taking small risks"-John Mason

So,if am going to 'practice what am preaching',then I've got to follow the title above.I can't categorically say 'I take risks',but I love challenges especially intellectual ones.I like to test my intelligence and see how far I can go,which is why I have shelved studying English after nurturing it for years-kind of'puppy love I guess.
Getting the feedback for my English Modules helped focus my attention on the areas to be improved on.Journaling hasn't helped that much as I get to abbreviate and use'my own terms' as I wish.Of course academic writing is very different and that,I haven't done in a long while...almost five years now.Huh!And I don't know if it's "too early to conclude",but I sure haven't been finding distant learning easy.I have to continually remind myself that I've got to do this against all odds.I owe it to myself more than anything or anyone else.This might not be the appropriate time to blog,but I've been studying all day and need a break from the books.I've almost forgottten what it used to feel like.I mean,I practically remind myself when I get doubtful that,I was once a pupil,student and was in College,may be not the best;but wasn't left behind.And am beginning to think this 'distant learning thing' isn't for me.Perhaps,if I had met with other students,interacted and made friends with them,I would be finding it more interesting than I am now.Exams're close-by and I feel like am way over my head.I scaled through in college even as a wife and mother,why should this be different?May be I'd have to call the Counselling Department as I've never been the type to struggle with studies(with the exception of mathematics).Without mentioning it to anyone yet,am already considering other options like being a full time day student attending lectures in the classroom,if it's the same amount.I can call that my fantasy for now as it's only a fickle of my imagination,since I don't call the shots.But in order to erase this thought off my head,things have got to improve because I cannot go on being distrcated when I've got 'work to do'.It surely would have been much better if I wasn't studying from home.Am sure of that,the challenges would be minimal as I'd be more focused.

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