Wednesday, September 30, 2009

CHANGE is eminent and permanent!

Whoever came up with the saying,"Change is the only constant thing in life" was darn correct.I can't begin to list all the changes I've personally made over the years.One of the obvious was drinking 'coffee'.It was like the word never existed until"South Africa" happened"!I never knew caffeine was toxic to my system until I arrived here.I wasn't a tea-drinker from the onset.I just never thought I was missing out on anything and it didn't bother me at all.I haven't always been a'food' fan,so to speak.So exploring food and drinks wasn't my thing-I loved fruits though.But there's one thing I know for sure,I have always preffered hot food to cold,and am still that way.So,I now drink coffee,chocolate drinks-from hot chocolate to milk shakes.But this is me am talking about,an overtly cautious and almost precaurious weirdo.I have always believed in having a balanced life,a good sense of well-being and not over-indulgence.It just comes naturally that am almost not an extremist in anything.Yet,I can be annoyingly meticulous.This trait comes in handy more than not because I get to see things "most people" would not see.I can be very attentive and observant,but negligent at the same time.I call that"minding my own business".I may pass by the same person like a hundreth time and not be able to give a description.Contrastingly,I may just take a cursory look or a glance and give a vivid and accurate description of a person or place.But that's just me being 'me'.I usually do this "to myself".Am a self-imposed perfectionist,but I don't push people the way I push myself.I set high standards for myself than I do unto others.So,in practically everything I do,I try not to be over-indulgent.If I was to be described by someone who knew me from childhood,the person would most likely miss out on certain things because I am still discovering myself as well.
Sixteen years back,my cousins would say am not an organised person and, I would likely say the same thing about myself if asked.I remember just pushing my clothes down the keep-bag and the boxes in our 9-foot room.My personal items would be found lying somewhere under the bed and I would feel embarrassed when am called to come get stuffs.Till this very day,I never seize to wonder if it was the teenage hormones or sheer negligence that made me that careless.In my present life,I seem to be struggling with the fact that my home can't be as organised as I want it to be.Am always picking up after my husband and kids.It is very exhausting and frustrating.The joy of living in a mansion for me would be the chance I get to have a space for everything.Books belong on a shelve,shoes should have their own place,tools in the store along with other things we don't use regularly and which doesn't belong in the lounge or kitchen;like the hoover for instance,the pram that's no longer in use and which I can't give away because I haven't met anyone to give it to.And the junk mails????Lord have mercy!I always feel quilty when I pack them from the letter-box knowing they're going to the trash.So,I let it lie around for a while and then look through groceries am not interested in and the cuts in booze I never tasted my whole life.But the truth is,I would feel much better if those junk mails don't get delivered into my letter-box in the first place.
So,I have changed from not realising I have innate organisational skills to sharing ideas about getting things done the right way.From a non-tea drinker to even a coffee lover-note:am not an addict to anything.Not even the movies I've loved watching from childhood that kept me glued to the screen everyday.I still have a vivid recall of some of the soapies of the mid 80's ,unlike most my peers.Hubby once aked me how old I was because I'm not really supposed to remember that period,but I do.So between drinking caffeinated tea and having a "mug" of coffee,everything's well balanced.It's not something I can't do without because I may not even drink coffee in months.When I do,I do not take more than one cup a day and not more than four times a week.My regular tea also becomes irregular when I can't go otu to town to get it because it's not sold in the neighbourhood stores.I take the herbal cammomile tea or the green tea-I've got two flavours of those.One is with mint,the other is a rejuvenating tea.These are my regulars.I settle for caffeinated tea,without sugar but milk when I've run out of the herbals.I get headache from lack of sleep,taking too much caffeine is adding salt to injury as my people would say.Besides,am just too health conscious to ingest anything without knowing the effect.

Am old-fashoned and still prefer prints to electronics.If it is an unconscious thing because am an aspiring author,then good for me.But the truth is,as much as I have found solace in the internet,it can't repalce my love for 'paper'.I love stationeries beyond words.I love to have books around and with me anywhere and everywhere I go.But then again, I must say that having access to the internet did not only make study materials and information easy,but it has also helped in keeping  me balanced and in tune with things.This machine cannot repalce my families or friends,not in a million years to come.But it has afforded me the medium to stay in contact and keep in touch with them.It would be very difficult to maintain that contact if I can't access it.I know friends who would rather chat with me online,send me mails and messages on facebook,and I appreciate that.And I also respect the fact that some people do not have access to the internet and would rather give me a buzz or a text message on my phone.What's important is that we're keeping in touch.I have met wonderful people from different parts of the globe on the internet.I wouldn't want to lose that.I cannot say that"old friends are better than new ones" because it's a subjective statement.It depends on the kind of relationship that existed between you back then.What I've also come to realise over time is the fact that,it is even more difficult to catch up with an old friend because everyone seem to have "moved on".If you have not communicated for a long time,you can't bridge the gap.They've made new friends and so have you.You'll now realise that you do not have anything in common in your present lives.And since not everyone enjoys going back in the days,you communication dies a natural death and you're just"friends" in saying but not in the reality of things.There are some of my friends I haven't spoken to in almost two years now,but with whom I can catch up and pick up from where we left,anytime we see again.It would seem like we were never really apart before.Being in this country alone without friends like I had back home have opened my eyes to things I probably wouldn't have paid attention to if I were still amongst my friends back home.There are times I feel like am the one doing all the work and trying to keep the line of communication open.If there's anything I've learned about friendship,like any other form of relationship,it is that,you give and take.You don't take and take.You may not reciprocate in the same way,but you can do something else to show you care.And it is for this reason that I do not get upset with some of my friends, who are waiting to hear or read from me always,when they do not initiate this act on their own.But like the saying goes,"life goes on"!!!

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