REFLECTIONS by BiliMaffy

Who says flying ‘solo’ can’t be fun? Think again! It’s Christmas holiday and as usual, my neighbourhood has little or nothing to show for it. With hubby being away, me being pathetically helpless with driving, the kids and I are as good as stuck until hubby returns. I think we’re looking at nothing less than a week from today. God, help me! Alright, so I can’t have discussions with the kids, but they sure know how to ask tens of questions, the ones they already have answers to; and the ones they really need answers to. I’ve had some good laugh watching these School drama and a romantic comedy…The Perfect Holiday, Just My Luck and Sydney White. And showing now is “the Ultimate Gift (Local Channel). I had to choose between that and “Surviving Christmas” on another Local Channel. The kids have turned the bed in the guest room into their ‘jumping castle’. Can you blame them? This is really one of those times I wish I had learnt to drive…So now am doing what is not really appropriate. Seein

God, I don’t want to leave this world without fulfilling the mission you have in store for me. I’m so tired of saying I want to do something, I wished that I had the opportunity to do more and be more, I wished that things were different, that I want to be something big…I’m so tired and am almost losing hope. What would it take to move from where I am, to where I want to be? What would it take to really be relevant and part of something historical? I have tried to be open-minded and unbiased in my thoughts and assumptions. But it seems I won’t be able to do much where am at now. It’s limited my chances and choices. It hasn’t given me that room to explore more options and just do what I really want to do and be. It’s easy for one to be judged wrongly, especially if all you do is “talk about” what you wish to do, without an action to walk the talk. The 2010 CNN Heroes really inspired me and reminded me that I can still do something memorable. That perhaps, I shouldn’t be in a hurry to fu

Last two Fridays, ( December 10th) hubby asked to take me out. I knew he wasn’t joking because he seemed to be in a vey playful mood. And with him, talks like that don’t come often. I didn’t really act all excited because I’ve sort of adopted our recluse lifestyle without much complaints like I do in the past. So in his usual manner, he suggested we went to a Restaurant (this was more like a tradition for occasional family outings), I declined. If he wanted to take me out, he had to give room for my opinion or I throw that offer out of the window (I didn’t say this out loud for your info).Fortunately enough, he didn’t argue when I suggested that I’d rather go to the Movies because just eating wouldn’t make much difference for once in two years outing…don’t ask! I got a double-package instead. We had been at the office all day and were both hungry. This was a good thing as my low appetite doesn’t really sit down well with him. I end up bringing remnants of my dinner home; during family

Welcome to - “ The never-ending story of my life”! Okay, I did the unusual yesterday, I mean last night. I went to bed before 9.p.m. It was actually a few minutes past 8p.m.Hubby came in from the lounge and asked what was wrong. I replied that I was tired. I had decided to sleep earlier than I usually do because I need to get to the root of this sleepy feeling, every morning. I may not be able to diagnose anything, but I was going to try my unconventional method of elimination first. What happened as a result of that was being awoken by 2 a.m and not being able to go back to sleep, till now…It’s 1.15p.m now and am not getting any sleep until later at night…I will be just fine! Some days are better than others. They say when there's life there's still hope. And it is with these thoughts that I pray, not just 'hope' that my father returns home some day. What else can I say? When you're related, you're related. You don't change that fact just by denouncing it.

Once upon a girl who chases the unattainable, seeks that which cannot be held unto, racing against tides, trying relentlessly to elude destiny, questioning fate, cursing life for being brutal and utterly unfair. Yet, remaining faithful and hopeful, taking solace in her innermost and most private spirituality. Inspite of life’s numerous and seemingly endless disappointments, she holds on to her beliefs, values, morality, honesty, openness, loyalty and unconditional love. She believes no matter how unkind life might have been to you, you can love someone, love people; even though they don’t love you back in return. Her large-heartedness brought her aches and pains, subjected her to being taken advantage of, made her helplessly vulnerable; but she bore it all in strides, turned it around as a weapon of strength rather than weakness…A loving heart is not a vice, contrary to what the world may make it seem. Since when did being good become a bad thing? In the twists and turns of life, some

The move... I’m not shy to admit I had some reservations about Jennifer Love Hewitt. I think the fact that she’s not in your face everytime you see or hear about Hollywood, has something to do with my reservations. I always like to see what role she’d play and if she’s truly talented…You know? Not jus a pretty face thang! So it was with this mindset that I decided to see this late night movie…”IF ONLY”! It was interesting. That’s all I’ve got to say, see it to believe it. I loved the movie. It starred Jennifer, a British guy named Paul Nichols and an older British man, a familiar face, Tim Hopkins. What can I say? The movie was just interesting and I think I saw a little bit of myself in Jennifer, let’s just leave it at that! I remember I intended to compose a Poem, before this time last year. The South African Broadcasting corporation (SABC2) organised a contest and had different themes. One of the themes was HIV/AIDS. But I didn’t submit any entry. I hadn’t the space and time to com